It’s OK to Talk, Mate
Movember and young men’s mental health
A message from our Co-Founder
Dear friends,
Every November, moustaches start appearing across Australia. They can look a bit silly, but Movember is about something serious: men’s health, and especially men’s mental health.
At Athenie’s Angels, we see how hard it can be for boys and young men to say, “I’m not okay.” Many of them grow up hearing that they should toughen up, sort it out alone, or keep quiet. So instead of reaching out, they go quiet. Too often the people who love them don’t know how much they are struggling.
This month we want to change that. In this issue you’ll find the facts about young men’s mental health, simple ways to start a conversation with a mate, son, brother or student, and ways you can get involved in Movember with us. We’ll also look back on a wonderful day at Journey to Joy 2026.
One conversation can change a life. Thank you for being part of a community that keeps talking.
With gratitude,
Peter Kalos
Co-Founder and Chair, Athenie’s Angels
Why young men’s mental health matters • Signs a mate might be struggling • How to start the conversation (ALEC) • Myths vs facts • Jack’s story • How we help • Our 2027 programs • Get involved in Movember • Exam stress tips • Journey to Joy thank you • Support our work
Movember started in Australia in 2003 and is now a global movement for men’s health. Each November, people grow a moustache, get moving or host an event to raise funds and get people talking about mental health, suicide prevention and men’s health.
For young men, the message really matters. Many young men are struggling, and many of them never ask for help.
|
3 in 4
Australians who died by suicide in 2024 were male |
Leading
Suicide is the leading cause of death for Australian men |
|
755
Victorians died by suicide in 2024. Every one was |
71%
of men living with a mental health condition say gender |
Sources: ABS Causes of Death, Australia, 2024 (preliminary data); Movember, The Real Face of Men’s Health, 2024.
Why don’t young men reach out?
The reasons are often learned early. Young men tell us that:
- They worry about looking weak. Messages like “harden up” or “boys don’t cry” stick.
- They don’t have the words. Many young men notice they feel “off”, angry or flat, but find it hard to name what is going on.
- They don’t want to be a burden. They think they should solve problems alone and not worry anyone.
- They don’t know where to go. Services can feel confusing, expensive or “not for people like me”.
Help works, and connection protects. Young men who feel they can talk to even one trusted person are better able to cope through tough times. You don’t need to be an expert to be that person. You just need to notice, ask and listen.
Young men don’t always say they are struggling. Often it shows in what they do. Look out for changes that last for more than a couple of weeks:
|
Mood
More irritable, angry or short-tempered. Seeming flat, numb or hopeless. Laughing things off more than usual. |
Behaviour
Pulling away from friends, sport or family. Drinking or using more. Taking more risks. Gaming or scrolling all night. |
Everyday life
Sleeping much more or much less. Missing school, uni or work. Losing interest in things he used to enjoy. |
If someone talks about wanting to die or not being around, take it seriously. Stay with them and call Lifeline (13 11 14) or 000 if they are in immediate danger.
Starting the conversation: ALEC
Movember’s ALEC guide is a simple way to check in with someone. You don’t have to fix anything. Being there is what counts.
|
A
ASK
|
Ask how he’s going. Mention what you’ve noticed: “You’ve seemed a bit flat lately. How are you really going?” Trust your gut and ask again if he brushes it off. |
|
L
LISTEN
|
Give him your full attention. Put your phone away. Don’t interrupt or jump in with advice. Ask “What’s that been like for you?” to show you’re interested. |
|
E
ENCOURAGE
|
Encourage action. Help him think about what might help, like sleep, exercise or time with mates. If he’s been struggling for a while, suggest talking to a GP, counsellor or Athenie’s Angels. |
|
C
CHECK IN
|
Follow up. A text a few days later (“Hey, been thinking about you, how’s things?”) shows you meant it and keeps the door open. |
Tip: Many young men find it easier to talk side by side than face to face. Try going for a walk, a drive, shooting hoops or grabbing food.
|
MYTH
“Real men don’t need help.” |
FACT
Asking for help takes strength. We see a doctor for a broken leg, and our minds deserve the same care. |
|
MYTH
“Asking about suicide puts the idea in someone’s head.” |
FACT
Asking directly and calmly does not increase risk. It can bring relief and open the door to support. |
|
MYTH
“He seems fine, so he must be fine.” |
FACT
Many young men get very good at hiding how they feel. A joke or “all good” can cover a lot. |
Jack’s story: “I thought I had to handle it on my own”
This story is a composite drawn from experiences young men have shared with us. Names and details have been changed to protect privacy.
At 19, Jack was in his first year of an apprenticeship. On the outside he was the funny one in the group. Inside, he felt like he was falling behind everyone else. He stopped going to footy training, spent most nights awake on his phone, and kept telling his mum he was “just tired”.
“I thought if I told anyone, they’d think I was soft,” Jack says. “So, I just kept it all in. It got heavier and heavier.”
Things changed when a mate from footy messaged him: “Haven’t seen you in ages. Want to grab a feed?” Over a burger, his mate said he’d noticed Jack seemed down and asked how he was really going. “I nearly said ‘all good’ like always. But he just waited. So, I told him.”
With his mate’s encouragement, Jack saw his GP and connected with counselling. “It wasn’t a quick fix, but I started to feel like myself again. Now I’m the one checking in on the boys. If you’re struggling, talk to someone. It’s honestly the best thing I did.”
Our services are free/low-cost for young Victorians aged 13–29. They are designed to feel welcoming, relaxed and judgement-free, including for young men who have never talked to anyone before.
- Free and low-cost counselling: one-on-one support with qualified counsellors.
- Peer support: connect with trained young people who have been there too.
- School programs: emotional resilience and help-seeking workshops for students and staff.
- Community events: safe, fun spaces to connect, belong and build support networks.
To talk to us, email atheniesangels@gmail.com or visit www.atheniesangels.org.au.
Our 2027 programs, including Building Resilience, Stress Management and Mind & Money, will be published on our website soon.
To register, simply send us an email through our website and tell us which programs resonate most with you. We will get in touch within 24 to 48 hours.
Get involved this Movember
|
Grow a Mo Start clean-shaven on 1 November and grow all month. Every mo starts a conversation. |
Move for Mental Health Walk or run 60 km over November, one for each of the 60 men lost to suicide every hour worldwide. |
|
Host a Mo-ment Hold a BBQ, footy match, games night or morning tea at school, work or home. |
Check in on a mate This one is free. Use ALEC this month with someone you care about. |
★ Exam season? Look after your mind
VCE exams run through November and ATAR results arrive in December. If you are feeling the pressure:
- Keep the basics going: sleep, food, water and some movement every day.
- Study in short blocks with real breaks away from screens.
- Talk to someone if the stress feels too big. You don’t have to wait until it gets worse.
Remember: one score does not define you or your future. There are many pathways after school.
On Sunday 25 October, our community came together at Monash Community Hall in Oakleigh for Journey to Joy 2026. Thank you to everyone who came along, volunteered, performed, donated prizes and spread the word. Your energy filled the room with hope.
Highlights of the event will be shared on our website soon.
Help us reach more young men
Every donation helps a young person get support when they need it. This Movember, your gift can help us reach more boys and young men before they reach crisis point.
|
$25
helps provide resources for a young person reaching out for support |
$50
helps fund a peer support session |
$100
helps fund a low-cost counselling session |
$250
helps bring a resilience workshop to a classroom |
Donate now: https://gofund.me/dcdfe5d22
Athenie’s Angels Aus. Ltd is a registered charity with Deductible Gift Recipient (DGR) status. Donations of $2 or more are tax deductible.
Researchers, Writers:
Paul Tsing
Aya Thomas